"Gilmore Girls" - Quotes from season 3

I've been busy last weeks, so it is probably the last post with quotes from "Gilmore Girls". But I still had time to choose the most interesting, sarcastic and wise from them.

"Gilmore Girls" is a mother/daughter story about life, love, managing problems and following their dreams. And also this show is very sunny, romantic, a bit dramatic and very witty. Its characters always make me smile, but with every season it becomes more dramatic.

Created by Amy Sherman-Palladino.
Starring Lauren Graham, Alexis Bledel, Jared Padalecki, Keiko Agena, Scott Patterson, Kelly Bishop, Edward Herrmann, Melissa McCarthy, David Sutcliffe, Milo Ventimiglia.

More "Gilmore Girls" quotes!

Episode 1

Lorelai: Last night, when I said to you "Tomorrow, no matter what, make sure I get up at seven," what I actually meant was "Tomorrow, no matter what, make sure I have the option of getting up at seven in case when seven comes, I actually wanna get up," which – as it happened – I didn't. Therefore, you're currently responsible for the great alarm clock slaughter of 2002.

Lorelai: Yeah. I wonder if Christopher and Sherry's baby is going to look like me?

Episode 2

Emily: At least she had a husband to kill.

Lorelai: Say "Sorry, Grandma, but if my mother sees you, she'll run screaming down the hall."

Christopher: She did not get there by herself.
Lorelai: Hey, have you ever met your daughter? She could get anywhere by herself! She could get to the third dimension by herself! She was helping the crossing guard when she was four.

Lorelai: By the way, I'm also a communist. Yes, because I look damn good in red.

Episode 3

Luke: Sorry, just missed my youth for a second. I'm back. Coffee?

Rory: You can't freak out, I'm freaking out!

Rory: No, this is not a gift. These are my records – grades, SATs.
Lorelai: It's Rory in a bag – you add water and her brilliance springs out.

Episode 4

Lorelai: I'm out hunting –
Rory: A favorite Lorelai Gilmore pastime.
Lorelai: And my shotgun backfires and my whole face spins around a bunch of times and winds up in the back of my head like Daffy Duck. [about her weird dream]

Lorelai: Lose the baseball cap, too.
Jess: You run the risk of his head falling off without it.

Episode 5

Lorelai: You don't need shoes! In my day, we walked twenty miles in the snow just to get to our shoes!

Lorelai: Okay now, if for some reason, he does turn out to have like a horn in the middle of his forehead, you will call me in one hour with a very high fever. [how to get out of boring date]

Episode 6

Lorelai: Check this out. [picks up a stack of catalogs] This is a stack of identical catalogs mailed to Lorelai Gilmore, Rory Gilmore, Lorelai Rory Gilmore, Lorelai V. Gilmore, Lorelai Victoria Gilmore, Lorelai Gilmo, Lorelai Gil, and Squeegy Beckinheim.
Rory: How would that get in there?
Lorelai: I once told a store my name was Squeegy Beckinheim just to see how many catalogs they would sell my name to, and apparently my name is to catalog companies what Brooke Shields' picture is to Chinese restaurants. [she knows how to entertain herself]

Lorelai: Aren't baby shower balloons supposed to reflect the sex of the baby? Blue for boys, pink for girls. What's green for, aliens?

Lorelai: I just wanna rearrange her whole house.
Rory: You can't do that.
Lorelai: Please? Let me just mess up her bed. You make a distraction, like setting a fire, and I'll run up and un-color-coordinate her sheets. [planning how to drive crazy Sherry]

Episode 7

Rory: Well, there's this big event that's happening in my town. . .
Paris: Pig race?

Jackson: My child-bearing arrangements are between me and Sookie.
Luke: And the Lord. Still not helping?

Luke: Do I look like a cobbler to you?
Lorelai: If I say yes, will you fix my shoe?

Episode 8

Lorelai: It's my fault, I'm not focusing.
Rory: Yes, that must be why we can't move a half a city block closer to us.

Episode 9

Rory: What is the oil for?
Lorelai: For pouring on Visigoths.

Natalie: You have your mother's wit.
Emily: Sometimes I wish she'd give it back.

Episode 10

Lorelai: I have a spider whose previous credits include the bathtub scene from Annie Hall trapped under that cup.
Dean: The size of a Buick?

Lorelai: Don't let his family see you. Spiders are vindictive.

Lorelai: You rented your house to Korn?

Episode 11

Maid: Your mother's in the living room.
Lorelai: So last chance to run, huh?

Alex: I actually called your inn. I was gonna leave a message, but this French guy just gave me your home number. Said I shouldn't worry about calling too late, that you usually stay up until three, four in the morning.
Lorelai: Yeah, don't worry about him, he's getting fired tomorrow. [about how Alex got her number]

Episode 12

Rory: We're not always going to like the same things. Like, you like Smashing Pumpkins and I don't.
Lane: But that's only 'cause you're close-minded and blind.

Episode 13

Emily: Yes, but you're not a kid, you're a grown woman. What are people going to think when they see a grown woman bunking down with a bunch of twenty-year-olds?
Lorelai: Well, if the twenty-year-olds are cute, they'll probably think: 'Lucky!' [about road trip to Europe]

Lorelai: It's heavy. Must be her hopes and dreams for me. [about a box from her mother]

Episode 14

Lorelai: That's the thing. I have no packing crisis. For the first time in my life, there is no packing crisis. See? This has never happened to me before. I'm all packed, ready to go, and fully confident that I have everything I'll need or desire.
Rory: So you're creating a crisis out of nostalgia?

Episode 15

Emily: I never really truly appreciated the Atlantic Ocean before. Three thousand lovely miles of water. [regretting that her anxious mother-in-law came to visit them from London]

Guest: Don't give me that attitude, Frenchy. You'd be speaking German now if it wasn't for me.

Episode 16

Lane: It's getting frustrating. I mean, there's so many great songs that have been written post-Cobain, but try and convince Zach of that.

Max: You really hate him
Lorelai: I smile, I say hi, I let him eat the good cookies.
Max: You wanna have him killed.
Lorelai: Only if I get a really good price. [about Rory's boyfriend]

Episode 17

Sookie: Jackson moved a table and just kind of nicked this spider. He didn't see the little thing, and just clipped one of its legs. And it was having trouble walking and we were so upset, but Jackson made a new leg for it out of a paper clip, but jamming the clip into the spider killed it instantly.

Miss Patty: Poor Edgar Allen Poe, he suffered so much. And now we gotta suffer along with him. [while listening to a very dull reading of "Raven"]

Episode 18

Lorelai: No comment on my lesbian hilarity. My, how far we've come.

Episode 19

Lorelai: Oh, I know! How about ... no.
Rory: No, no, you can't keep doing that. You can't just start a thought and then say no. Finish them or don't start them at all.
Lorelai: You're very totalitarian today.

Episode 20

Lorelai: Your first cop-raided party. I am just so proud.
Rory: Mom.
Lorelai: I just wish I could've been there.

Episode 21

Lorelai: Little tip - the whole stalking thing works infinitely better when you don't actually smash your face in the window.

Rory: Louise, what's your grandmother wearing to graduation?
Louise: Hopefully the pearls I get when she kicks.

Episode 22

Dean: You don't have to do this.
Rory: I know. That's why it's fun. [giving him a wedding gift]

Poster - Lauren Graham fan site

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